North Koreo’n Leader Dead or Injured?

April 29, 2020
Kuala Lumpur International Airport, Malaysia
Author: Cul Prit

This is a FuNK News exclusive report, courtesy of our brave informant, Mr. Doland Tramp who risked his wife to get us the secret files from White (People’s) House. The below report is based on the information from the files.

Kim Kardeshi Un during a routine march to Red Palace, tripped over a South Koreo‘n paver-block hurting his knees; Almost triggering a Puke War between the two Countries.

An image of what an impending puke war between the Koreon countries could look like.
Puke war between the Koreo'n countries averted

The fall had such an impact on his knees that his brain‘s subtle lobe got heavily damaged.

Suddenly all the doctors that Kim Kardeshi Un had asked to be executed were called back urgently from the grave. Looking at this dire situation of The Divine Almighty Leader of North Koreo, the doctors suggested an immediate sex change operation which could line with the Divine Leader’s inner self and then eventually a knee replacement to give his swollen brain some space to heal.

Kim urges his doctors to make him a she man so that he can do himself.
Kim Kardeshi Un instructing the doctors on how to operate

Post successful surgery the spotlight moved away from him, when he bombed the world with the latest announcement. The shocking announcement came after the doctors informed the North Koreo govt. that Kim Kardeshi Un is not fit to run...

...a country!

The Almighty Great Kim Kardeshi Un has in his latest televised video release assured his people that in his absence his sister Be Yo Nce will execute people on his behalf. The northern country is affected by bouts of Co-Win-1953 flu (as per the latest press release from the North Koreo’n govt.) It is estimated that the whole weight of her brother is on Be Yo Nce’s tiny shoulders now.

* Correction: It is estimated that the whole weight of her brother’s duty is on Be Yo Nce’s tiny shoulders now. We at the FuNK News wish for a healthy and quick recovery of the great leader. Heil Kim Kardeshi Un!